The last 6 weeks has been a whirlwind of flu, strep and sinus infections. Once we all recovered from all that, we moved right into a few things that has slung me into a reality of being a mother which I'm not sure I am ready for...
Children's Sabbath happens at our church one time a year and it is a day we take aside to celebrate the children's ministry in our church. Joshua sings in the kindergarten choir. Each and every Wednesday, when it is time to go to practice, it is a battle of wills. He is a very reserved child. I can feel the feelings he is having and the anxiety he feels about being in a large group, a new situation, doing new things. We have learned to be creative in our convincing, trying to make it seem like it is his idea to walk in the room. Sometimes, quite often actually, we enlist the help of someone walking by, who we know would be good at talking with Joshua. Choir practice the week before the Children's Sabbath had not gone well. He cried and did not participate. Sunday came around, Sam was still sick and so it was just Josh and I going to church. The choir teacher, Ms. Marty had already called about Joshua that week and lovingly assured me that he would do fine. When I saw Ms. Marty, and the choir come around with no Joshua, I was worried. They told me he had refused to come. So I left my ushering post, and walked down to the Sunday school rooom where he was with two worship care teachers. He was with the building blocks, building a church. So I convinced him to walk with me.
The more steps I took, the more convinced I became of the importance of him participating in singing that day. He needed to do this. He needed to know that he could overcome this feeling inside himself telling him to be uncomfortable. So we talked. I gave him the team spill, and that Ms Marty was depending on his beautiful voice to be a part of today's songs. I then said, you don't have to sing, but you must go up there and sit with the choir. You are part of the choir and you can't let them down by not even going up there. That, Joshua, would be very disappointing. BAM! it hit him like a ton of bricks. He looked at me and sat right down with is choir.
He sang too. Beautifully if I say so myself. After church he said, "mommy, are you not disappointed in me?" I said no Joshua, I couldn't be prouder. I know how hard that was for you to do. And even though you really didn't want to do it, you did because it was the right thing. I am so very proud of you. He glowed.
